There was once a man who dreamed of a more perfect humanity, a day when everyone would be considered equally…
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SACRAMENTO — The citizens of California overwhelmingly voted this month to ban acoustic guitarists from rhythmically slapping the low E…
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DAYTON, Ohio — Local guitarist Max Gordon’s revealed today that her attempt to sell her old guitar amplifier has already…
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Well, well, well. So you stroll into this here guitar shop on a Friday and have the audacity to ask…
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GENEVA — Scientists at the European Organization for Nuclear Research discovered yesterday that Iron Maiden’s 8:46-long “Brighter Than a Thousand…
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WASHINGTON — The United States of America utterly failed in its shame-filled attempts today to obscure its bulging, prominent Presidential…
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BAYAMÓN, Puerto Rico — At the Drive-In and The Mars Volta guitarist Omar Rodríguez-López created and released an entire 49-minute…
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DES MOINES, Iowa — Local Lowe’s manager Darrell Winchester removed Slipknot percussionist Shawn “Clown” Crahan from the store again last…
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PEORIA, Ill. — Friends of Shaun Conner were disappointed but unsurprised as he continually raised the defense stat of his…
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NEW YORK — Overly-confident 24-year-old Matt Baxter convinced himself today that he could hoist a new, king-sized mattress to his…
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