Bobby Korec
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CHICAGO — Historically undecided voter Gunther Wexler waited eight grueling hours yesterday to cast a “protest” vote for Harambe, the…
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Kevin Tit
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NEW YORK — A visibly desperate and agitated President Donald Trump loaded his IMI Desert Eagle handgun today and travelled…
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Kyle Sekaquaptewa
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LANSING, Mich. — Far-right protesters who descended on the Michigan Capitol today arrived several hours later than scheduled, due to…
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James Knapp
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WEST LAWN, Penn. — A violent altercation in an IHOP parking lot yesterday between members of doom-metal band Savage Agnes…
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Patrick Coyne
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ATLANTA — Quasi-political punk Aaron Scovell convinced himself yesterday that, if he had a job and was registered, his theoretical…
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Ted Pillow
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WASHINGTON — A panicked President Trump is debating whether releasing his infamous “pee tape” would help or hurt his chances…
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Billy Patterson
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MOULTRIE, Ga. — Local Black man Darius Phillips received an “I Tried to Vote” sticker after waiting in line for…
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Piotr Parker
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CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Raspy-voiced, leather jacket-clad renegade Det. Mitchell Steele, who by all accounts plays by his own rules, solved…
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TALLAHASSEE, Fla. — Local QAnon follower and noted conspiracy theorist Nick Perriman complained to friends today that President Trump is…
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Kevin Tit
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PASADENA, Calif. — “Wildboyz” star Chris Pontius started a voter awareness campaign today that includes showing his balls to strangers…
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