SALT LAKE CITY — Employees of a local Goodwill thrift store reported a loud disturbance today, as a woman discovered several crates of religious music…
LOS ANGELES — Disney Studios announced today that the upcoming live action remake of The Little Mermaid is set to feature a real live penis…
DAVENPORT, Iowa — A group of four white men found yesterday standing in an empty field outside of Davenport are, in fact, not in a…
BOSTON — Boston College sophomore Daniel Milner recently purchased a PlayStation VR gaming headset and what he claimed was a copy of Skyrim VR, a…
BURBANK, Calif. — Local gamer Doug Saunders recently purchased a high-end gaming chair, equipped with advanced technical features, a dynamic cushioning system, and the ability…
BAKERSFIELD, Calif. — Local punk Griffin Myers was hospitalized last night after provoking mythical scene veteran Butch “The Butcher” Caldwell, otherwise known as a “real…
PITTSBURGH — A local punk house is gearing up for its fourth consecutive year of flu season, now plaguing residents for the equivalent of one…
SAN MATEO, Calif. — PlayStation executives announced today that Square Enix’s Shadow of the Tomb Raider will be this month’s free PS Plus game, and…
LOS ANGELES — Production of a new movie based on the iconic Battletoads video game franchise has reportedly stalled due to difficulties surrounding the film’s…
BETHLEHEM — A local show billed as “The Most Important Event in Human History” reportedly ended as a “total fucking bust,” thanks to a confusing…
AKRON, Ohio — Local gamer Tim Gilbert is facing criticism from his friend group for focusing on his career and personal life rather than honing…
ANAHEIM, Calif. — Local computer programming academy CodeBlue has come under fire after hiring a retired Marine Corps drill sergeant to oversee their ten week…
The Police is a seminal rock band whose unique blend of musical genres paved the way for countless innovative bands. Their music is timeless and…
HORSESHOE OVERLOOK — A local camp of the infamous Van Der Linde Gang is reportedly running dangerously low on medicine, which could prove deadly in…














