DALLAS — Local small aircraft pilot Skippy Barnes is supplementing his skywriting income with a clandestine, government-backed chemical-spraying side gig, high-level sources demanding anonymity confirmed.…
MENLO PARK — With a wave of disappointment washing over himself for squandering another potentially productive day, an employee at Facebook headquarters was reportedly distraught…
LINCOLN, Neb. — After being laid off from his job at a regional cardboard box supply company last week, local gamer Dale Lowry has reportedly…
MUSHROOM KINGDOM — Local Brooklynite Mario Mario was reportedly unable to get his resume under 10 pages following a bout of unemployment due to the…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local gamer Kayla Stephenson reportedly included various video game skills on a job resume in an attempt to look more professional. “As…
CHICAGO — Local executive Reginald Dixon sent a company-wide email from the security of his HEPA-filtered panic room moments ago stating that the Coronavirus threat…
LANSING, Mich. — Due to her familiarity with the visual indicators that a major boss battle was about to unfold, junior accountant Megan Williams was…
ATHENS, Ga. — Record store clerk Jimmy Taylor, well-liked by customers for his attentiveness, knowledge of music, and generally affable nature, was fired yesterday by…
FARGO, N.D. — Account manager Jamie Duncan is in disbelief that she will lose everything in her upcoming split from the mid-level job she has…
CARY, N.C. — Local co-op worker Alan Swanson is fed up with assumptions that he’s somehow in charge of coworkers at least 12 years his…
SEATTLE — Vertex Solutions employee and local bassist Gretchen Garcia is leading the fight to expand paid leave to musicians wanting to spend time with…
ROUND ROCK, Texas — Interactive storytelling fans were disappointed this week by a new choose-your-own-adventure novel that promised the opportunity to see through the eyes…
PHOENIX — Lifelong punk Roddy Scotts assured a potential employer in an interview yesterday that, in five years, he sees himself posthumously headlining a benefit…
UNDISCLOSED — A secret job opening for an entry level position in the Illuminati posted today requires a minimum of 3-5 years prior experience working…
WEST SENECA, N.Y. — Legendary crust punk Selma “Pusbubble” Gormin shocked her friends and fellow squatters this morning, announcing that she was “sick of this…