Hardcore Tag Archives - Page 376

Ted Pillow • October 5, 2020

BETHESDA, Md. — Uber Eats is critically overburdened by President Trump’s quarantine and is begging for FEMA assistance after just…

Dan Kozuh • October 5, 2020

SEATTLE — Local guitarist Sadie Love swore today that her new button maker will be well worth the startup cost…

Dan Luberto • October 4, 2020

NORWALK, Conn. — Local punk and low-ranking member of his friend group Brandon Smith is reportedly completely unaware of his…

Mike Civins • October 4, 2020

QUEENS, N.Y. — Aging metalhead Greg "Nailgun" Dellarose has replaced the patches on his battle vest with his important, personal…

Theo Konstantino • October 4, 2020

LEBANON, Ohio — After seeing hundreds of political posts that end with "let that sink in," local man Dick Babcock…

Ella Gale • October 4, 2020

CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. — Police detained NASA astronaut Charles Washington today as he boarded the Orion V spacecraft during launch…

Mike Civins • October 3, 2020

WASHINGTON — Luxury fashion designer Hugo Boss AG has been selected to create a bold, new uniform for Immigration and…

Patrick Coyne • October 3, 2020

ESSEX, Conn. — Former precocious teen Clarissa Darling has gone from “explaining it all” to spending the majority of her…

Ella Gale • October 3, 2020

Californians were warned today to protect themselves by staying both inside and outside, due to the ongoing risks associated with…

Bobby Korec • October 3, 2020

HEMPSTEAD, N.Y. — Self-described “emo kid” and 40-year-old elementary school teacher Tucker Grating reminded his class today that when spelling…

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