RICHWOOD, W. Va. — Local punk Jesse Hallenbeck asked her family today what time Christmas dinner is supposed to go on at her grandma’s house…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Greg and Marjorie Lamothe have begun the painstaking preparations for their son Jake, a philosophy major, to return home for the holidays,…
BOSTON — Stanley Remington, the older brother of local punk James “Meatball” Remington, is “doing fantastic,” according to a report issued by the mother of…
CHARLEROI, Pa. — Self-proclaimed digital activist Rich Costen is “totally and happily” unaware that not one of his Facebook friends follows his account on the…
HANSON, Mass. — Local punk Brandon Gardner will continue his annual Thanksgiving tradition of hiding from his family in his aunt’s garage, Gardner himself confirmed…
HUNTINGTON, N.Y. — Members of the Colombo family have successfully hidden their marijuana use from each other for years despite being open about it with…
PHOENIX — Netflix has ordered three separate hour-long, stand-up comedy specials from local dad Bob Cecil after his hilarious comedy performance during a family dinner…
NEW HAVEN, Conn. – Researchers at Yale University found that the average hardcore frontman will be betrayed 612 times before the age of 18, according…
Help! I’ve been playing Dark Souls nonstop for the past three weeks and I’m completely stuck. Does anyone know how to get past the part…
SALT LAKE CITY — Self-identified punk Alexandra Fairuz discovered earlier today, via a search of her surname on Ancestry.com, that she descends from a long…
MILWAUKEE — Thomas Hannigan, a 22-year-old with a family history of addiction and psychological disorder, is acting like a “complete baby, chickenshit buzzkill, and probably…
SALT LAKE CITY — Local mother Robin Johnston saved money for three years to take her entire family on a week-long, all-inclusive guilt trip straight…
AUSTIN, Texas – Game night at the Robinson house ended in a tie on Thursday when the left-leaning family tried to play the classic Guess…
WILMINGTON, Del. – A local grandfather expressed outrage and envy at the increasing social acceptance of transgender Americans, according to sources trying to enjoy dinner…
TUCSON, Ariz. — Local woman Sarah Abott reportedly had a personal “modern day Hanukkah miracle” this past week when, despite only having enough battery to…