BATON ROUGE, La. — Customers at the Eager Legume coffee shop made a collective, unrehearsed announcement to bob their heads up and look around in…
CHICAGO — Local man and ostentatious snob William Huller was struck with an intense wave of envy as he pretended to read ‘Gravity’s Rainbow” in…
CHICAGO — Area metal band Blood Fuel was left reconsidering their group’s future after hearing a man adjust his chair in a coffee shop at…
We never intended to write this review, but since every coffee shop within walking distance is playing it, here is our review of The National’s…
Until recently I’ve never sweated any of this talk about how automation will replace humans in the workforce. But the rise of artificially intelligent, procedurally…
DENTON, Texas — Lifelong wrestling enthusiast Ryland Reeves reportedly attended a poetry slam at Circe Coffee under the assumption that it was a match, sources…
This morning I woke up motivated. Motivated to make art. So, just like so many amateur artists in America, I drove to one of the…
SAN FRANCISCO — Customers at local coffee shop, Verdant Cafe, collectively felt shivers go through their spines when a barista announced a “cow’s milk” latte…
Hey. Hi! Yep, you’re reading the sticker over my left nipple correctly. It says “BLOOD DONOR HERO”. I made it myself. I’m not usually one…
PURCHASE, N.Y. — Local woman Elle Rice winced this morning while waiting for her black coffee refill as the song “Fade Into You” by Mazzy…
ROCHESTER, Minn. — A free show held at the recently reopened coffee shop Jittery Jill’s Caffeine Cave was reportedly “not even worth acknowledging the Facebook…
PALMDALE, CA — Customers and baristas of The Catalyst Coffee Shop were shaken to their core Sunday afternoon when sick fuck Andrew Murphy ordered an…
MADISON, Wis. — An audience at a local coffee house performance art event this past weekend was disappointed when the headliner, Indigo Starr, was unable…
CHICAGO — Local barista Jeffrey Stern had a creative breakthrough after thinking of the perfect name for a band that will never exist outside of…
The gap between rich and poor widens each year. Jeff Bezos takes his billions to space while Elon Musk trolls global economics with meme tweets.…