Russ Bizaro
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PHILADELPHIA– A group of local concertgoers in their late 30s were spotted this past weekend excitedly passing around a little…
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Matt McInerney
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PALO ALTO, Calif. — A hot new startup company just launched a revolutionary weather app for aging punks that lets…
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Chris Bowen
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BIG FLATTS, N.Y. — 51-year-old nu-metal fan Ricky Clud recently expressed that Saliva's early 2000s classic “Click Click Boom'' was…
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Matt McInerney
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AUSTIN, Texas — Aging punk Bryce Horn is preparing for doomsday by backing up his collection of “rare” MP3s to…
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Neel Bhakta
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Hey, you. Yeah, the guy with black square-frame glasses and skinny jeans. Sorry, I was just minding my own business,…
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Anthony Carrano
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New York — Local thirty-something punk Charles Murray is unable to settle on an official complaint about this year’s Fest,…
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Matt McInerney
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GUILFORD, Conn. — 36-year-old punk Finn Birch is reportedly telling everyone about the show he went to this weekend, with…
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Tim Graham
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FALL RIVER, Mass. — Local 37-year-old punk Ryan Foley realized he had inadvertently abstained from drugs and alcohol long enough…
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Jessica Lillian
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CENTRALIA, Wash. — Avid metal fan Andrew Rostburgh is plagued by recurring horrifying dreams in which he’s accidentally naked and,…
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Jose Balderas
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LOS ANGELES — Members of Blink-182 were hurriedly escorted off stage just as they played the final notes of their…
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