OAKLAND, Calif. — Heavily pierced punk Kevin Avery has trapped a local woman in an unending, one-sided conversation, revealing a horrifying slew of opinions, according…
We have a problem in this country, an unfair immigration system that forces immigrants to risk their lives sneaking across the border, work jobs that…
DURHAM, N.C. — High school teacher Eddie Dunn was named “coolest teacher in school” in the Mount Hills Senior High yearbook superlatives last year for…
Say hello to Xavier Morris. Just your average 20-something bearded hipster, Right? Dead wrong. You see, there’s something about Xavier that sets him apart from…
PHILADELPHIA — Local pet owner Dylan Murphy could not find a suitable adoptive home for his beloved pet cockatoo last week, despite incessantly screaming “FREE…
So this is this water park you all wouldn’t shut up about, huh? This is not as amazing as you kids made it out to…
TUCSON, Ariz. –– Members of local pop-punk band Trashlings were advised by their GPS to avoid another disastrous tour altogether after nine hours of loading…
The figurative dust has not yet settled on Charlottesville, Virginia, where Heather Heyer, a counter-protester to an evil white supremacist march, was tragically murdered by…
PITTSBURGH — After blasting through the first 27 songs of their set last night, local grindcore vocalist Alex Brown asked if his band had time…
SAN FRANCISCO — Born-again metalhead Pete Ericson will only listen to Testament albums released before 1992, claiming those records are “the sacred works of metal…
Imagine suffering a skeptical glare or wisecrack every time you made an appointment, reserved a table at a restaurant, or even just introduced yourself. Sounds…
MEMPHIS, Tenn. — Local stoner metal band Soundmurder are making “painful” sacrifices to accommodate a tedious, sober search for a new day job following their…
DENVER — Semi-professional photographer Dennis Bachmann stands accused this morning of overenthusiastically supporting same-sex female relationships, according to multiple creeped out sources. Allegations spread after…
I’m not much of a computer guy, OK? I work 10-hour days at McSimmon’s Tool & Die six days a week, so let’s just say…
AUGUSTA, Maine — Local drummer Dicky Carter only needs to borrow a kick drum, snare drum, a stool, and one stick from the other bands…