FRANKENMUTH, Mich. — Local grindcore band Ültimate Castration came under fire for adding a completely unnecessary umlaut over the ‘u’ in its name, an addition…
LOS ANGELES — Local Leo Andrew Allsop is distraught after discovering that astrological differences appear to be an active threat in his several-month relationship with…
“Groundhog Day” is widely regarded to be one of the best mainstream comedies of the ‘90s, and for good reason! Bill Murray’s performance is superb,…
WINNETKA, Ill. — New Trier High School bully from the class of 1997, Al Edwin, is amazed at what losers and lame motherfuckers can get…
CUPERTINO, Calif. — Insurance claims adjuster Jason Parkinson became frustrated this morning over the unhelpful password recovery hint that he created, which only made retrieving…
KALAMAZOO, Mich. — Local stoner Dave Truman set out to prove to friends, family, and acquaintances that weed is not addictive by abstaining from the…
BOSTON — Local 39-year-old Tool fan Mark Gibson spent his entire shift last Wednesday angry at the fact that a genius of his magnitude was…
EVANSTON, Ill. — Local man Ryan Michaelson began a new ritual last October, placing $7 in his fridge each time he gets up for a…