Ryan Danley
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March 6, 2021
WASHINGTON — Father Damien Karras was elated to hear during a recent conversation with the demon Pazuzu that his recently…
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Patrick Crooks
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February 13, 2021
UNKNOWN — Survivors of Icelandair Flight 198, which crashed somewhere deep in the Arctic tundra last week, lauded vegan survivor…
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John Danek
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January 13, 2021
DENVER — Julian Rodriguez, guitarist of Black Sabbath tribute act Supernauts, fought back tears this morning as he purchased a…
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Nariko Ott
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December 17, 2020
LOS ANGELES — 35-year-old self-described “Dashboard Confessional superfan” David Calva awoke today to find his male-pattern baldness went into overdrive,…
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Gregg Gethard
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December 16, 2020
PLYMOUTH, Mass. — Matthew Kearns, a bartender at the Ye Olde Tap House located in the rear corner of a…
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John Dixon
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December 15, 2020
SOUTH BEND, Ind. — A Biohazard patch on local metalhead Barret Boone’s denim jacket is reportedly becoming less of an…
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Lauren Lavín
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December 7, 2020
SOUTHBURY, Conn. — Local urban legend The Southbury Slasher could not complete his annual killing spree last week when his…
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Ryan Danley
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December 5, 2020
LOS ANGELES — “Law & Order: Special Victims Unit” head writer Stephen Sanders has completely run out of the show’s…
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Henrik Persson
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December 2, 2020
AMSTERDAM — Belgian metalhead Joost Lambert spent nearly four hours in the Museum of Torture yesterday looking up every item…
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John Danek
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November 29, 2020
LANSING, Mich. — Media analysis thinktank MediaViews released a troubling report today, finding that the comment sections of Lansing’s WLXT…
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