DAYTONA BEACH, Fla. — Local man Jamaal Andie, a.k.a. DJ SKRAMZ, asked several DJs and showgoers last night at the Apex to loan him their…
BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Rising rents in the Manhattan neighborhood of Hell’s Kitchen have forced the vigilante known as Daredevil to relocate to the much more…
DALLAS – After days of deliberation, scene veteran Preston Lemons still hadn’t decided whether to attend a show at the Nickel and Dime Club that…
MONTREAL — Gildan Activewear has developed new technology enabling band T-shirts to shrink without ever having to be washed, Gildan’s team of scientists announced today…
ANAHEIM, Calif. — Audience and band members alike were confused last night when punk band Lieutenant couldn’t decide to whom to dedicate one of their…
NEW YORK — Progressive punk Otto Williams replaced the phrase “bum a cigarette” earlier today with “homeless person a cigarette” in an attempt to be…
NEW HAVEN, Conn. — 13 ½-year-old punk Bailey Tolbert is in a “full-blown” midlife crisis, unsure what to do with the remaining years she has…
BOSTON — Stanley Remington, the older brother of local punk James “Meatball” Remington, is “doing fantastic,” according to a report issued by the mother of…
BRIDGEPORT, Conn. — A seemingly random episode of Frasier syncs perfectly with Orchid’s debut album, Chaos Is Me, according to devout screamo fan and self-described…
I can finally admit my mother was right about my clothing, political beliefs, and everything else I had used to define myself as a person…
SEGA has issued the following press release reminding holiday shoppers that there is no shortage of their Mini Saturn Classic units: We here at…
THIS. HAS. TO. STOP. Everyone in this bar knows the jukebox costs $1 per song or $3 for 4 songs. This isn’t a charity. I’m…
INDIANAPOLIS — A secret show last Tuesday at local DIY venue The Outhouse plagued by violent moshing, clouds of firework smoke, and outraged neighbors would…
As the saying goes, opinions are like Black Flag tattoos: we’ve all got them and a few of them we regret. Of my 27 Black…
We’ve all been there: driving home from a show, endorphins pumping, and you and your friends begin brainstorming what is certain to be the next…
