Patrick Coyne
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SPANISH FORT, Ala. — Millennial Thomas Cervantes proudly stated today that he’s old enough to remember when MTV still played…
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DES MOINES, Iowa — Local Klan member and conservative activist David Mount has changed his views on wearing masks in…
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DULUTH, Minn. — Local couple Alice Parker and Shaun McCoy announced the reunification of their relationship today, after having already…
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Patrick Coyne
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NEW YORK — NBA commissioner Adam Silver is using the league’s ongoing suspension due to COVID-19 to finally add “no…
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Zach Russell
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NEW YORK — Local man David Treyborn realized today, while testing the flow of the new bidet attachment he purchased…
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Gregg Gethard
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GLENSIDE, Penn. — A new report from the Centers of Disease Control and Prevention states that a majority of American’s…
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Doug Francisco
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NEW YORK — Quarantined high school bully Evan Maddox, under stay-at-home orders for the past three weeks, gave himself swirlies…
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ATLANTA — Georgia Governor Brian Kemp announced that the state will close hospitals, re-open bars, and “just let God do…
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SAVANNAH, Ga. — Local punk Jake Stanton used a photo of a trashy apartment as his Zoom background yesterday to…
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Sari Beliak
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BAKERSFIELD, Calif. — Local dad Craig Harper admitted today that the lockdown set in place to stop the spread of…
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