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trump, Adam & eve, religious

Trump Confuses Religious Base by Introducing Adam & Eve Executive During Press Conference

Tiana Miller • May 16, 2020

OKLAHOMA CITY — Religious supporters of President Trump were confused and apprehensive yesterday when he invited an executive from popular…

Study Shows the Most Played Video Game of the Quarantine is ‘Try Not to Cum Challenge’

Twitch Plays Hard Drive • April 4, 2020

NEW YORK — A new study by Columbia University has revealed that the most played video game of the COVID-19…

milfhunter, coronavirus

A Statement From MILFHunter on the Coronavirus

Matt Wassung • March 28, 2020

Valued Subscriber, As you know, the Coronavirus has fundamentally, but hopefully only temporarily, changed everyday life. We care about two…

horny, mom, milf, old, porn

Website Has No Idea What to Do With Actual Horny MILF In Your Area Who Just Signed Up to Fuck With No Strings Attached

Charles Bill • March 22, 2020

DETROIT — The operators of popular pornography site PornGash were confused and panicked last night when an actual local, horny…

onlyfans, covid-19, coronavirus

Girl On OnlyFans Shows Ass, Titties, Several Signs of Advanced Stage Coronavirus

The Hard Times Staff • March 19, 2020

SAN JOSE, Calif. — Popular OnlyFans model LilVickiXX posted a new video earlier today where she showed her ass, tits,…

playboy, young, porn, discover, new

Bored Teen Looking at Dad’s Playboys Can’t Believe What People Used to Consider Porn

Patrick Crooks • March 10, 2020

NAZARETH, Pa. — Local teen Brian Miller found his father’s old stash of Playboys while snooping through the garage late…

mike, bloomberg, mike bloomberg, porn, ad, pornhub

Pornhub Video Ruined By Mike Bloomberg Ad

Kyle Sekaquaptewa • March 2, 2020

DENVER — Local pornography enthusiast Brett Wallace was caught off guard moments ago by an advertisement for Democratic presidential candidate…

Star Wars Porn Parody Changes Luke and Leia to Just Step Siblings

Louie Aronowitz • February 7, 2020

MONTREAL — Representatives from Brazzers have confirmed that their highly anticipated nine-part pornographic Star Wars parody series will modify the…

tumblr, horny, art, data breach

REPORT: Massive Data Breach Impacts All 12 Super Horny Art Kids Still on Tumblr

Patrick Coyne • January 11, 2020

NEW YORK — A large-scale data breach of Tumblr’s current user base compromised the personal information of all 12 horny,…

As a Feminist, I Like to Think of Them as Matriarchs I’d Like to Fuck

Jon Swihart • January 3, 2020

Since my transformation from a nice guy (but like, a legit actual nice guy) to a certified male feminist last…