LONG BEACH, Calif.—Aspiring musician Keith Brown’s practice space was transformed from a once-fun jam area to an utterly sexless dungeon, sources sadly confirmed. “Welcome to…
When Stephanie McKinley called me an ugly big-nosed freak in 9th grade, I knew I was destined for great things. Who knows where I would…
So I’ve been seeing and hearing a lot of buzz about the new loser my mom is banging and I totally want to check him…
BERKELEY, Calif. — Touring band ‘The Flattered & The Curious’ regaled tenants of the apartment they are crashing in with tales from the road while…
BOSTON — Friends and relatives of local resident, Brian Gibbs, have reported that the 28-year-old has insisted for years that his frequent tremors are due…
MONTREAL — Members of the pop-punk Simple Plan are having an existential crisis after realizing that life never really stopped being a nightmare as they…
LOS ANGELES — The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences handed out the awards for Best Film Editing and several other utterly meaningless categories…
NASHVILLE, Tenn. — Local musician Bort “Borty” Giancarlo was observed introducing his long-term girlfriend and creative collaborator Anna Paloma as his bandmate, according to touring…
IOWA CITY, Iowa — Researchers at the Iowa Center for Gene Therapy announced that they may have developed a way for parents to prevent their…
ST. LOUIS — Diehard Tool fan Glenn “Stinkfist” Miranda missed the band’s entire set after a brief display of martial arts resulted in him getting…
PUEBLO, Colo. — A local man’s plan to introduce his childhood best friend of over 20 years to his adult best friend for the past…
CHICAGO — Morrissey revealed that he’s waiting for a few more people to show up to the Riviera Theatre before ultimately canceling the gig entirely,…
OAKLAND, Calif. — Local photographer Tyler Pettiston suggested that ska band Passive SKAggression maybe try a serious one after hours of silly poses and cartoonish…
PORTLAND, Ore. — Local musician, show promoter, and all-around glue that holds the scene together Robby Baxter announced the debut of a new band that…
WASHINGTON — The Straight Edge Supreme Court will hear arguments this week in the case of Lewis v. Monster Energy which could overturn the landmark…