WASHINGTON — In an effort to bring jobs back home to the U.S., President Trump ordered soldiers enlisted in the military to kill American citizens…
EL PASO, Texas — Local musician Lenny Windsor was sentenced to two consecutive life sentences today for his part in a wild game of “Fuck,…
CLEVELAND — Showgoer Timothy Boyce has become trapped in a mosh pit after his panicked flailing and aggressive shouting were mistaken as genuine moshing, witnesses…
WASHINGTON — President Trump pardoned a 5-year old Bourbon Red turkey named Mikey this morning, sparking outrage amongst law enforcement officials who insist the turkey…
PHILADELPHIA — Local coreman Alex Gonzalez was struck down by a hail of fists in a brutal crowdkilling incident at last night’s Strangulation show, according…
PHILADELPHIA — Following his criticism last week of political correctness in what he referred to as the “pussy generation,” Clint Eastwood came under fire again…
GAINESVILLE, FL – Summertime is all about easy, effortless style. With temperatures rising, now is the perfect time to update to a breezy and chic…