Jessica Carreiro
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Girlfriends are always trying to fix you. Eat healthy. Get your GED. Don’t forget my birthday. At a certain point,…
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Stephen Bell
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PIGEON FORGE, Tenn. — Local mother Julia Smith assumes that her completely asexual daughter Andrea is actually a lesbian who…
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Brendan Krick
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GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. — Local woman Brittany Mullins instructed her punk boyfriend Miles Blanchard not to mention his job, band,…
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Patrick Crooks
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PALO ALTO, Calif. — Scientists for Tesla’s robotics team have reported that recent requests from senior management indicate that they…
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Dianne Nora
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WALTHAM, Mass. — A recent study published by the New England Journal of Medicine found that women who date men…
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James Knapp
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BALTIMORE — Surgeons at Johns Hopkins Medical Center recently performed the first successful procedure to physiologically affix classic rock fan…
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Josh Klasco
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DENVER — Local man Liam Cooper announced that a peanut butter and jelly sandwich his girlfriend charitably made for him…
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Josh Klasco
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DENVER — Local man Liam Cooper announced that a peanut butter and jelly sandwich his girlfriend charitably made for him…
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Contributor
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KABUL, Afghanistan — High ranking members of the Taliban decided to once again ban music throughout Afghanistan after your band’s…
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Patrick Crooks
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CHICAGO — Local boyfriend who’s changed, he swears, Britt Keller promised on again-off again girlfriend Carolyn Mueller that he will…
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