Donald Trump Tag Archives - Page 17

halloween, candy, voter, fraud, trump, orange, pumpkin, costume, cute

Trump Warns Antifa Will Put Voter Fraud in Your Kid’s Halloween Candy

Jason VanSlycke • October 31, 2020

WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump once again stoked fear yesterday by warning U.S. citizens that “Antifa terrorists will hide voter…

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Origin of Fake News Traced Back to Friend Saying He Played ‘Pokemon Purple’ in 2002

Jeremy Kaplowitz • October 10, 2020

WASHINGTON — Researchers have discovered that the origin of the "fake news" phenomenon stretches all the way back to 2002,…

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post-hardcore, debate, 2020, hardcore, melodic, argue, poser

2020 Presidential Debate to Include Question on What Constitutes “Real” Post-Hardcore

Clara Endres • September 29, 2020

CLEVELAND — Moderators for 2020’s first Presidential debate reportedly added a question regarding an issue that’s been hotly contested since…

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spin doctors, trump, coronavirus, band, music, task force

Trump Appoints Spin Doctors to COVID-19 Task Force

John Merrifield • September 23, 2020

BEDMINSTER, N.J. — President Trump has appointed the once-popular 90s alt-rock band Spin Doctors to lead the country's coronavirus task…

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RNC Picks Up Coveted TruckNutz Sponsorship

The Hard Times Staff • August 27, 2020

WASHINGTON — RNC Chair Ronna McDaniel announced today that the fourth night of the Republican National Convention will feature wall-to-wall…

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Steve Bannon Arrested for Gobbling Up Skiers at Bottom of Hill

Mark Roebuck • August 20, 2020

WASHINGTON — Former Donald Trump advisor Steve Bannon was arrested yesterday on charges of reportedly devouring skiers at the bottom…

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Sobbing Eric Trump Chokes Down Seventh Can of Goya Beans

Jordan Breeding • July 20, 2020

WASHINGTON — A broken and sobbing Eric Trump choked down a seventh consecutive can of Goya beans this morning after…

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‘Mass Effect’ Fan Skeptical That Their Choice in Presidential Election Will Influence Ending

Giovanni Colantonio • July 14, 2020

RIVERTON, Wyo. — Avid Mass Effect fan Martin Shore plans to opt out of voting in the upcoming 2020 presidential…

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Hydroxychloroquine Transforms President Trump Into Cool Alter Ego “Donny Love”

Alex Salcido • May 30, 2020

WASHINGTON — President Trump’s experimental use of the anti-malarial drug Hydroxychloroquine has transformed the Commander-in-Chief from a boorish, morbidly obese,…

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Opinion: The Virus Doesn’t Care What Race You Are, but the Government Does so Some of You Are Fucked

Ed Saincome • May 21, 2020

All people must unify now! Dammit, this virus doesn’t care what your race is! It will harm you and your…

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