Patrick Coyne											
										
										•
										
									 
									
										SPRINGFIELD, Va. — A surprising new study found that in reality, your cat’s voice sounds nothing like the lispy, insultingly…									
									
										Read More →									
								 
							
												
																	
								
								
									
									
										
																						
												Jerrod Kingery											
										
										•
										
									 
									
										AUSTIN, Texas — Social media marketing manager Anthony Skipper forwarded a complaint about his tortimese housecat Nickels moments ago to…									
									
										Read More →									
								 
							
												
																	
								
								
									
									
										
																						
												Shea Strauss											
										
										•
										
									 
									
										PORT CHARLOTTE, Fla. — Local housecat Poobies was the only resident of 62 South Woodside Drive that contributed to cleaning…									
									
										Read More →									
								 
							
												
																	
								
								
									
									
										
																						
												Doug Francisco											
										
										•
										
									 
									
										BOULDER, Colo. — Straight edge kid Patrick Cohen attempted to make his cat Bucket alert and calm Tuesday afternoon by…									
									
										Read More →									
								 
							
												
																	
								
								
									
									
										
																						
												Zac Lux											
										
										•
										
									 
									
										ROCHESTER, N.Y. — The only working toilet in local punk house The Mooseknuckle is simply a litter box following a…									
									
										Read More →									
								 
							
												
																	
								
								
									
									
										
																						
												James Knapp											
										
										•
										
									 
									
										PUTNAM, Conn. — Residents of local punk house The Jailblock realized yesterday that no member of the household could remember…									
									
										Read More →									
								 
							
												
																	
								
								
									
									
										
																						
												Rick Homuth											
										
										•
										
									 
									
										BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Local ex-boyfriend Clyde Satler caught his luckiest break since his separation from his former girlfriend yesterday, realizing…									
									
										Read More →									
								 
							
												
																	
								
								
									
									
									
										BOSTON — Local straight edger Austin Evans quietly formed an undying, eternal bond at a party last night with Tugger…									
									
										Read More →									
								 
							
												
																	
								
								
									
									
										
																						
												Doug Francisco											
										
										•
										
									 
									
										Cats! The grist for the internet content mill, the furry little fucks that keep you up at night with their…									
									
										Read More →									
								 
							
												
																	
								
								
									
									
										
																						
												Ashley Naftule											
										
										•
										
									 
									
										Music sets you free. It's like an enema for your soul. I know that sounds like lame hippie shit, but…									
									
										Read More →