Patrick Coyne
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SPRINGFIELD, Va. — A surprising new study found that in reality, your cat’s voice sounds nothing like the lispy, insultingly…
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Jerrod Kingery
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AUSTIN, Texas — Social media marketing manager Anthony Skipper forwarded a complaint about his tortimese housecat Nickels moments ago to…
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Shea Strauss
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PORT CHARLOTTE, Fla. — Local housecat Poobies was the only resident of 62 South Woodside Drive that contributed to cleaning…
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Doug Francisco
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BOULDER, Colo. — Straight edge kid Patrick Cohen attempted to make his cat Bucket alert and calm Tuesday afternoon by…
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Zac Lux
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ROCHESTER, N.Y. — The only working toilet in local punk house The Mooseknuckle is simply a litter box following a…
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James Knapp
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PUTNAM, Conn. — Residents of local punk house The Jailblock realized yesterday that no member of the household could remember…
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Rick Homuth
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BLOOMINGTON, Ind. — Local ex-boyfriend Clyde Satler caught his luckiest break since his separation from his former girlfriend yesterday, realizing…
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BOSTON — Local straight edger Austin Evans quietly formed an undying, eternal bond at a party last night with Tugger…
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Doug Francisco
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Cats! The grist for the internet content mill, the furry little fucks that keep you up at night with their…
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Ashley Naftule
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Music sets you free. It's like an enema for your soul. I know that sounds like lame hippie shit, but…
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