WASHINGTON — Tiffany Trump, daughter of President Donald Trump, received her very first text message from her father earlier today, sources close to the First…
You’re sitting at a Mexican restaurant with some friends trying to enjoy a veggie fajita when out of the corner of your eye you spot…
BUFFALO, N.Y. — Punk band Dump Cumsters finally gained entry into Canada this morning after nine hours of explaining to border agents that their Canadian…
ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Aging punk Archie Simpson was left speechless last night after discovering his 10-year-old cousin ironically listening to an album he considers “life-changing,”…
AUSTIN, Texas — Local punk Ciara Reynolds is still perplexed by the tracking status for her package was updated from “delivered” to “stolen” in a…
Well that settles it, this website is terrible! The weather has been all over the place this month and I just wanted to figure out…
DENVER — BeatBox, a new subscription service designed to help struggling musicians, began its first round of new drummer deliveries to the doorsteps of paying…
We live during a time of unprecedented sexual liberation and exploration. We as a society no longer tolerate slut shaming and modern technology has made…
DENVER — Members of the Denver hardcore crew Punch ‘Til Dead supported their local music scene again last night by standing outside in the parking…
MONTREAL — Gildan Activewear has developed new technology enabling band T-shirts to shrink without ever having to be washed, Gildan’s team of scientists announced today…
SAN DIEGO — Local hardcore kid and Terror fan Aidan Bennett purchased a new dental insurance plan yesterday in anticipation of the band’s upcoming release…
Are you the victim of gaslighting? Of course you are. Everyone you know is lying to you and they all think you are gross and…
MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. — Google announced a new navigation mode for its popular Google Maps smartphone app yesterday, offering simulated dad-based directions that will consist…
Earlier this month Sesame Street script and songwriter Mark Saltzman made the claim that Bert and Ernie are, and were always intended to be, a…
PLEASANTON, Calif. — Local punk Jesse Watson is breaking out his collection of AFI records earlier and earlier each year, fellow seasonally sensitive sources confirmed.…