Audrey Vieira
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ARLINGTON, Texas — Five years after celebrating its grand opening, a Subway sandwich shop saw sales double with the arrival…
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Doug Kolic
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VANCOUVER, British Columbia — A local man who coupled a T-shirt with a blazer must be an absolute creative genius,…
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Sarah Cortina
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SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local insufferable man Mitch Roberts announced recently that he was “about to be so annoying,” a sentiment…
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Shane Pauker
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SEATTLE — The World Health Organization formally recommended people only consume a disappointingly low number of beers at lunch, citing…
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Kevin Coutu
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NEW YORK — Local therapist Dr. Lauren Mitchell reassured her patient Monday that it is completely normal for a loser…
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Tim Graham
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HANSON, Mass. — Local bigoted alcoholic Bud Cullen will likely live longer than many members of his family, according to…
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Ben Sobieck
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COLLEGEDALE, Tenn. — A local child developed a new kind of “little” diabetes after eating only Little Debbie snack cakes,…
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Kevin Coutu
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NEW YORK — NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell revealed that the organization is unveiling a new policy to address the domestic…
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Casey Smith
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WASHINGTON — Secretary of Health and Human Services Robert F. Kennedy Jr. announced that he has patented denim condoms, confirmed…
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Cam Berkowitz
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BAKERSFIELD, Calif. — A new study from California State University, Bakersfield found that aggressively and methodically punching the air within…
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