TARZANA, Calif. – Straight Edge LAPD Officer Donald Harvey could not decide whether to plant narcotics on a man from Reseda after an altercation Friday…
PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Initial intimidation of the 6’ 7 muscly, bearded, heavily tattooed man with his arms crossed was subsequently squashed as word spread of…
“Move it, football head!” For some, this iconic line immediately evokes memories of the classic Nickelodeon cartoon ‘Hey Arnold!’–starring a far-out New York pre-teen named…
BRATTLEBORO, Vt. – Local authorities are still trying to identify a body that washed up on the banks of the Connecticut River last week but…
SAN LUIS OBISPO, Calif. — Recent skeet shooting enthusiast Farley Gunther is reportedly “none the wiser” on the whereabouts of the large amount of missing…
HILDALE, Utah – 28-year-old polygamist Jacob Jensen is ready to leave his bachelor days behind and become a devoted husband and father to a number…
BOSTON — Merriam-Webster caused 45-year-olds across the country to collectively blow a gasket by adding “vinyls” as an official entry to their list of recognized…
It’s a bittersweet feeling to realize you’ve peaked, but at least when I look back up at my personal zenith I can honestly say, “not…
LOS ANGELES — Staff at the Melrose Avenue Denny’s location are beginning to openly question if the members of local punk band Governmatricide are using…
BOISE, Idaho — Local youth pastor Chase Rexley gained quite a following in his church after revealing that he doesn’t believe in God, sources who…
DALLAS — Frequent concertgoer Peter Logan once again was accused of not taking his therapy sessions seriously after responding with shouts and rounds of applause…
NEW HAVEN, Conn. — Your good friend of 17 years Bryce Evans once again proved that his immense wealth and family connections leave him unable…
HALSINGLAND, Sweden — A new study revealed that the vast majority of individuals aged 26 to 42 consider the acid cult that kills people featured…
KANSAS CITY — Missouri native Glenn Lawson, who was found guilty of reckless handling of a firearm last March, is nearing completion of his court-mandated…
NEW YORK – Local punk Chris Lanning was recently caught in the embarrassing act of cutting both an all-beef frank and blow with the same…