Sam Eardley
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July 25, 2022
Oh, you like the "Stranger Things" soundtrack, huh? Yeah, it's pretty nice. Modular synths, analog warmth — you've got to…
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WASHINGTON — U.S. Marshals discovered a mysterious package outside of the Supreme Court which was later revealed to be an…
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Jose Balderas
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July 24, 2022
LOS ANGELES — Representatives from Neutrogena announced they finally perfected a formula strong enough to be certified as “Goth-Strength” by…
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MILFORD, Conn. – Local man Gary Miller's fleeting moment of peace away from his grueling, hellish, and tedious daily life…
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Dustin Newman
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July 23, 2022
OMAHA, Neb. — Members of local indie band Tetracycle are pioneering a new lo-fi sound but admit it's not intentional…
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Mimi Kenny
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July 23, 2022
NEW YORK — Nominally cisgender/heterosexual individuals with amusingly low alcohol tolerances, colloquially known as “two-beer queers,” are advocating for their…
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Doug Kolic
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July 22, 2022
BAKERSFIELD, Calif. – Local crisis actor Alex Perkins expressed his desire to burst out from his creative cocoon and start…
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Sarah Feliciano
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July 21, 2022
LOS ANGELES — Grindcore frontwoman and recent gynecological patient Lexi Tyler discovered her never-before-heard guttural vocal abilities during an IUD…
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COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo, — Local landlord Montgomery Hawthorne Jr. found a way to give back to his financially struggling residents…
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Jon Ruggiero
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July 20, 2022
PUNXSUTAWNEY, Penn. — Local leftist, and amateur craftsman, Flint Cropwell admits to harboring a burning hatred for people who espouse…
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