John Danek
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“The Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away.” I have no idea what that statement means, but that’s what the vocalist…
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Bobby Korec
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HOLLYWOOD, Fla. — Former president and disgraced for-profit university owner Donald Trump revealed that he will commemorate the brave men…
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Jerrod Kingery
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COMMON BEAGLE SMALL INTESTINE — Health authorities called upon legendary white blood cell police officer Osmosis Jones to come out…
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Freelancer
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PORTLAND — Ardent leftist and Socialist Rifle Association member Jamie Stoltz was hospitalized after severely damaging her tongue by biting…
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Ryan Danley
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CENTRALIA, Wash. — Local patriot Rick Staler is concerned that the size of the flags mounted in the bed of…
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BINGHAMTON, N.Y. — Local graphic designer Fletcher Townsend remains totally oblivious to the fact that his work portfolio continues to…
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Patrick Crooks
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WASHINGTON — Prominent conservatives nationwide are beginning to inquire if they are still morally obligated to listen to Ariel Pink…
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WASHINGTON — Embattled congressman Matt Gaetz shocked officials inside the Beltway with a bombshell announcement regarding his age, stunned Capitol…
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Andy Holt
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MONTREAL — Following the success of Assassin's Creed: Valhalla, Ubisoft hinted that their next game would delve further into history…
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FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. — A proposed presidential library for disgraced former President Trump is expected to feature the world’s largest…
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