Dom Turek
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October 22, 2021
LINCOLN, Neb. — A local woman was seen performing life-sustaining measures on her Marlboro Menthol cigarette after finding it barely…
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James Knapp
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October 4, 2021
BALTIMORE — Surgeons at Johns Hopkins Medical Center recently performed the first successful procedure to physiologically affix classic rock fan…
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John Merrifield
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December 11, 2020
Declawing an animal is a barbaric and sadistic practice and mainstream society is finally starting to take notice. Some states,…
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CHICAGO — Fast food behemoth McDonald’s announced today that they will remove the McRib from their menu worldwide to enable…
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John Dixon
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July 2, 2020
QUINCY, Mass. — Local 30-year-old Danny Sullivan went under the knife this morning for a dangerous operation to remove the…
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John Merrifield
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June 20, 2020
NEW YORK — Ofc. Peter McKenzie of the NYPD underwent a controversial and dangerous surgery last week to alleviate stress…
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Cory Cousins
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June 12, 2020
DALLAS — Patients at Dallas General Hospital learned yesterday that Dr. Graham Alder, one of the facility’s most trusted surgeons,…
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Krissy Howard
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May 31, 2019
MADRID — Valeria Lopez, the oldest millennial in the world, died late last night at the age of 39 following…
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Zac Townsend
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September 7, 2018
LOS ANGELES — Singer/songwriter and self-proclaimed “antichrist” Marilyn Manson is in stable condition today recovering from spinal removal surgery that…
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Jonathan Diener
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October 9, 2017
LOS ANGELES — Surgeons at the Cedars-Sinai Medical Center completed an experimental procedure this morning, adding extra ribs to Morrissey’s…
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