Harry Valentine
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CHARLESTON, S.C. — The Gadsden Flag, an icon of the American Revolutionary War that sports the phrase “Don’t Tread on…
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Steve Packosky
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Whoops, looks like you jumped headfirst into the discography of newly-discovered black metal band Øde Festning without checking to see…
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Dan Kozuh
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KENILWORTH, Ill. — Local metalhead Travis Garnette was dejected after failing to scare unsuspecting suburbanites while wandering around Lovelace Park…
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Johnny Amizich
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WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump signed an executive order that required Disneyland to reopen Splash Mountain and “Song of The…
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Steve Packosky
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BURGETTSTOWN, Pa. — The mosh pit at a concert by popular metal band Pantera doubled as a team-building activity for…
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Tim Sheard
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NEW YORK — Columbia University agreed to re-hire several prominent phrenologists in a bid to quell President Trump’s threat of…
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Matt Husser
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WASHINGTON — President Trump announced the creation of the new Federal Institute for Regulating Ethnonormality (FIRE) agency that would complement…
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The Hard Times Staff
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LOS ANGELES — The White House Correspondents’ Association surprised potential guests by announcing Jeff Dunham’s most racist puppet, Bubba J,…
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Steve Packosky
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MONTGOMERY, Ala. — Legal advocacy organization Southern Poverty Law Center recently updated its Hate Map, an interactive tool to track…
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Matt Oriente
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BLUE ISLAND, Ill. — Reformed skinhead, public speaker, and talking head Tom Lupine is struggling to make ends meet as…
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