Punk Tag Archives - Page 465

joe biden, bernie sanders, debate, politics, republican, democrat

Bernie Sanders Accidentally Tells Joe Biden “Nice Set” After Debate

Peter Woods • March 15, 2020

WASHINGTON — Democratic Presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders accidentally told former Vice President Joe Biden “nice set” after tonight’s democratic debate,…

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bassist, sexual misconduct, bad, gross, sad, press, article

Bassist Accused of Sexual Misconduct Just Happy to be Named In Article For Once

Patrick Coyne • March 15, 2020

TACOMA, Wash. — Bassist Todd Francona, recently accused of sexual misconduct by several women, was just happy that his name…

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Opinion: A Jury of My Peers Wouldn’t Be Dressed so Nice

Yancy Lee Crawford • March 15, 2020

Your Honor, take a look at this jury. When I arrived here for my trial, I was told the jury…

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Emotional Support Dog Also Fucking Terrified of Flying

John Danek • March 15, 2020

ATLANTA — Local emotional support dog and shivering, terrified Spitz-mix Bartholomew was forced yesterday to fly on a 5-hour commercial…

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midwest, midwestern, goodbye, friendly, nice, wholesome

Midwestern Goodbye Enters 20th Hour of Inching Closer to Front Door

Luke Woodward • March 15, 2020

BARLOW, Ky. — Local woman Roxana Carozza is entering her 20th hour of the dreaded “Midwestern goodbye” this morning, still…

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And1 Clothing Announces Line of Shorts for Hardcore Guys Who Never Play Basketball

Kevin Tit • March 14, 2020

ALISO VIEJO, Calif. — The And1 clothing company is introducing a new line of shorts crafted specifically for hardcore kids…

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Tinder Date’s Penis Looks Nothing Like Unsolicited Dick Pic

Johnny Mo • March 14, 2020

GLENDALE, Calif. — Fraud victim Megan Howard made an emergency exit through her date’s bathroom window last night after an…

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arcade fire, theatre, crowded, dangerous

Man Arrested After Yelling “Arcade Fire” in Crowded Theater

Bobby Korec • March 14, 2020

DENVER — Local police apprehended miscreant Max Yelban last night for mischievously shouting “Arcade Fire” in a crowded theater and…

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music video, viral, old, youtube, spotify

OK Go Celebrates 1 Billion YouTube Views, 10 Spotify Streams

Claire Brown • March 13, 2020

CHICAGO — Pop-rock band and music video powerhouses OK Go recently celebrated reaching over one billion views on their YouTube…

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american history x, bad person, gross, dirty, terrible

Worst Friend Only Watched First Half of “American History X”

Cory Cousins • March 13, 2020

CINCINNATI — Brent Samuels, widely regarded as a terrible friend and questionable person all around, abruptly suspended his viewing last…

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