Let’s go ahead and address the elephant in the room. Yes, I took the $3,000 we had saved over the past 4 years to record…
Noise Musician Preparing to Spend Seventh Consecutive Thanksgiving Lying About Being a Jazz Musician
Noise Musician Preparing to Spend Seventh Consecutive Thanksgiving Lying About Being a Jazz Musician
TOLEDO, Ohio. – Local noise musician Gary Wilkerson spent the past week researching music history and terminology in order to convince his immediate family that…
So many people around here think that the scene just appeared one day and has been magically going strong ever since. But what you have…
DENTON, Texas — All members of local noise band Conflicted Hump-Feels recently experienced an existential crisis after accidentally writing a hook during practice, sources close…
MUNCIE, Ind. — Romantic partners Louise Keller and Ty Walsh announced that they are breaking up after Walsh shaved his beard and Keller cut her…
OMAHA, Neb. — Local guitarist Sebastian Melendez purchases the most inexpensive PA at his regular music equipment store following a detailed, four-hour description of every…
INDIANAPOLIS — Your arch-nemesis allowed you to enjoy the majority of a record by a band you did not realize is Christian and plans to…
Freud definitely called it back in the day: everywhere you look, we’re surrounded by phallic symbols. And, subconsciously, we’re all drawn to these penile stand-ins.…
We’ve all been there: we’re at our local Costco looking for an anonymous thrill and we see a punk starting to walk towards us in…
WASHINGTON — The United States Treasury announced they will introduce another round of ⅛” to ¼” adaptors into public circulation for the first time in…
ST. LOUIS, Mo. — Local crust punk Lou “Canker Sore” Schultz revised his bucket list to include getting a disease named after him in an…
APPLETON, Wis. — Teenage prodigy Shari Ford is being hailed as the next great bassist after mastering the electric bass guitar 16 minutes into her…
TULSA, Okla. — Local venue owner Michelle Kirk reportedly doubled her gross income by installing a new booth that sells photos of audience members actively…
LEXINGTON, Ky. — Local musician Teddie Hutchinson broke his 23-day streak of avoiding anything resembling a natural food when he accidentally ingested a mouthful of…
NEW YORK — Members of Racked Brain returned from a weekend “tour” and immediately began telling their friends tales of a “packed and absolutely bonkers”…