LANCASTER, Pa. — 25-year-old punk Ricky Lewis called a press conference on Friday to admit that he had lost his grasp on popular music well…
OAKLAND, Calif. — Dennis Henderson has continually hit “next” in Spotify’s shuffle mode for the last two hours, and has vowed not to stop until…
NEW YORK — Rapper and producer J. Cole was honored by the Pulitzer Prize Board early this afternoon with a shittier, blander version of the…
LANSING, Mich. — Local man Jerry Schmidt celebrated his birthday yesterday, and with it, another year of his favorite music and movies losing their cultural…
DALLAS, Texas — Concerned mother and sole reason for her children’s anxieties Pamela Yates suggested this morning that her kids “try listening to happier music,…
BRIGHTON, Mass. — 46-year-old punk Cameron Matthews is now willing to expand his musical horizons and give some new music from 2004 a listen, according…
IRVINE, Calif. — Turtle Rock Elementary 5th-grader and admitted music snob Brandon Mosley insisted on Friday that he prefers “Weird Al” Yankovic’s non-parody works, according…
BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Local punk Chelsea Bowers is reportedly preparing for what will surely be several rounds of involuntary music trivia before leaving the house…
NEW YORK — Fans seeing post-rock band We Make Noise Sounds last night weren’t entirely sure whether the group had started playing, or if the…
BOSTON — A new study conducted by the Berklee College of Music has found that one in five jazz cats are now “going hog wild”…
ALBANY, N.Y. — Local man Evan Carr stumbled upon Train tracks recently during a deep depression, narrowly escaping certain death, helpless but relieved family members…
WASHINGTON — Longtime National Public Radio Editor and incredibly tiny person Nick Callum is “sick and tired” of musicians using his custom-sized desk for performances…
LOS ANGELES — Musician Rydell Howsoff has successfully transitioned his love of playing guitar into something he “thinks about doing here and there,” sources close…
FRAMINGHAM, Mass. — Audio engineering giant Bose has completed development of headphones that can recognize a consumer’s sub-par music choice and automatically cancel it out…
AUSTIN, Texas — Researchers at the University of Texas released a study today proving that indie-rock band Gypsy Casino’s attempt to create a “quality, experimental…