Louie Aronowitz
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PERRYSBURG, Ohio — A recent posting of singer/songwriter Dan Sheen’s Bandcamp link has silenced his local friend group chat despite…
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Giovanni Colantonio
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BEAVERCREEK, Ohio — Local father Stu Campbell is reportedly fed up with having to clean hundreds of rupees out of…
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Liam O'Malley
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OSLO, Norway — YouTuber Konleith Narvesen is reportedly at a complete loss following the announcement that the newest Zelda game,…
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Tyler Simpson
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The highly anticipated podcast from iconic gaming duo Link and Navi has finally debuted, and sadly, they have produced an…
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Matt Shore
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CLOCK TOWN — A Termina citizen took to the streets yesterday to denounce the large, ominous moon inching ever closer…
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Kevin Flynn
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HYRULE — Feeling completely shaken after pulling the Master Sword from its pedestal, unlocking the path to the Sacred Realm and…
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Kevin Flynn
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CLOCK TOWN — Selling out his entire inventory after five minutes of announcing a restock, the Happy Mask Salesman announced to…
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HYRULE — A local looter named Link was seen breaking into random buildings, destroying valuable clay pots and stealing the…
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Louie Aronowitz
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SAN FRANCISCO — Email marketing specialist Seth Samael, widely considered one of the most diabolical internet admins, was seen twirling…
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Camillia Nazanin
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SEATTLE — Sephora patrons rushed into local stores early Friday for the launch of Majora's Mask, Nintendo’s limited-time exfoliation product,…
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