ANN ARBOR, Mich. — The group of gutter punks that loiters near 5th and Huron employs many invented terms for states of impoverishment, sources hurrying…
Hola. Mucho gusto. That means “Hi, pleased to meet you.” Did I learn that from your little fucking owl? ¡No! (That means “No!”). I learned…
I have been utterly fantastic lately: my thoughts are rapid, my emotions are shifting back and forth at breakneck speeds and I feel all of…
INDIANAPOLIS — Local man, and Duolingo enthusiast, Brandon Cole horrified friends and acquaintances gathered at an Italian restaurant when he attempted to order food for…
PITTSBURGH — Popular language learning app, Duolingo announced they will be adding a new “Eddie Vedder” course to their catalog designed to help members learn…
DELRAY, Mich. — Leading Juggalo scientists confirmed fascinating new research which indicates that “whoop whoop” has numerous meanings including “hello,” “goodbye,” and “show me your…
NEW YORK — Sigur Ros fans are beaming this morning upon hearing the band’s new album which perfectly captures the universal experience of being wèuupøhjc…
OAKLAND, Calif. — Local man Jeff Beeswick reportedly can’t decide whether to pronounce foreign words like some sort of pompous asshole or an uncultured idiot…
Get this, hepcats: we sat down with one of the red hot jazz combos of our times, the Frankie Tops Quintet, and wouldn’t you know…
CINCINNATI — Organizers of the National Spelling Bee expressed serious concerns this week after learning that the highly-regarded competition is in serious danger of running…
NEW YORK — Self-described “cinema aficionado” Kevin Clifford has spent the past several months becoming fluent in Japanese in order to “watch” Kurosawa movies while…
BATON ROUGE, La. — The space reserved for learning a new language in the brain of local woman Mariko Hess is instead storing every lyric…
TAMPA, Fla. — Local video game speedrunner Lulu Gardner reportedly changed her boyfriend’s language to Japanese in order to get through an argument with him…
NEW YORK — Progressive punk Otto Williams replaced the phrase “bum a cigarette” earlier today with “homeless person a cigarette” in an attempt to be…
Original article has been translated from Simlish for clarity. Immigration continues to be a dividing issue, and it can be hard to find the…