VACAVILLE, Calif. — Local thrash band VomIts-Its officially canceled their summer tour yesterday after every member was forced to attend summer school, according to super-bummed…
ELLICOTT CITY, Md. — Teenage punk and C+ student Geoff Berger was given a second yearbook photo this week to accommodate his 18-inch high, multi-colored…
High school is a minefield. It’s the first time young people feel the pressure to distinguish themselves as worthwhile individuals. That’s why it’s always so…
ADDISON, Ill. — Former student Francis “Frankie” Murray received an honorary GED yesterday from the administration of Addison Trail High School, celebrating 20 years since…
TOLEDO, Ohio — 28-year-old Sammy Warner was shocked last week when attending her 10-year high school reunion by how much her former classmates have aged,…
HAMILTON, Ohio — After choosing the “bad grades” story route during his initial playthrough of senior year, Tommy Martin has began a New Game Plus…
ALEXANDRIA, Va. — Local parents Joyce and Rich Gloppin have severely overestimated their 9th-grade daughter Dani’s social standing and ability to obtain illicit, cool drugs,…
AUSTIN, Texas — Recent transplant Andre Alvarado was reportedly unsure which merch table was socially acceptable to aimlessly stand by late last week while attending…
LONDON — Local steampunk Alexi Franklin was assaulted yesterday by fellow Pincham High classmate and noted steamjock Victor Gryphon, multiple witnesses confirmed. “He kept calling…
Growing up I thought high school was gonna be full of parties and whacky hijinks where my three best friends and I would chase girls…
ITHACA, N.Y. — High school student Peter Church etched a swastika into his 9th period math class desk in a bizarre attempt at “reclaiming” the…
THE INTERNET — A Facebook friend of yours, whom you vaguely recall from high school, couldn’t be more excited to share an exciting, not-at-all predatory…
PEORIA, Ill. — Infamous sophomore bully Peter Fazio has chosen to target Dane Sumner’s large facial birthmark for hazing, choosing to leave Sumner alone about…
HIGHLAND PARK, Ill.— Highland Park High School was rocked today by an appalling act of violence when Cards Against Humanity shoved Magic: The Gathering into…
MT. VERNON, Wash. — Students and faculty at George Washington High School were enraged last week after cancer-stricken student Zachary Mitts defeated “totally rad” quarterback…