Jay Shingle
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Increased metabolism, stronger vision, boosted immune system (um, HELLO COVID), reduced cancer risk, lowered cholesterol, and strengthened brain function—these are…
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Matt Wassung
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KEENE, N.H. — Local crystal healer and tarot card reader Elizabeth Stuart plans to donate her body to pseudoscience upon…
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Sari Beliak
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AUSTIN, Texas — The first aid administered Sunday by a volunteer medic is the closest thing protester Sammi Ramirez has…
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James Knapp
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PORTLAND, Maine — Residents of local punk house the Fire Trap added more tap water today to the house’s already…
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Jimmy Adamson
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So last week I was feeling under the weather: sniffling, a little dry cough, fever, you know the drill. Normally…
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Dan Rice
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I’m not saying I don’t take COVID-19 seriously, I do. We all need to do our part and self-isolate or…
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Kevin Hufe
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T’ARTHAR DESERT — A team of local heroes found themselves in distress recently, after a level 26 necroscorpion murdered beloved…
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Zach Raffio
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It’s stories like these that just break your heart. As a former smoker myself, I know how dangerous cigarettes can…
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Bobby Korec
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Abs: Everyone wants them. No one’s got them. Except yours truly. In today’s world, there just aren’t many people willing…
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REVERE, Mass. — Misguided 43-year-old street punk Martin “Peanut” Landers announced today that he will be upping his cigarette intake…
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