Bobby Korec
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PORTLAND, Ore. — Local crust punk Julian “The Stain” Rainer stunned a group of friends by somehow clogging a perfectly…
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MEDFORD, Mass. — The basement practice space at 234 Syrup Street is reportedly overrun by enough Aspergillus fumigatus to dampen…
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Khadija Hassan
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MINNEAPOLIS — Unvaccinated couple Chris and Hannah Davidson excitedly shared the results of their latest COVID tests at a massive…
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Tony Morse
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GEORGE, Wash. — Dave Matthews Band is raising alarm among epidemiologists and everyone who isn’t in a fraternity or sorority…
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Dan Kozuh
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SAN FRANCISCO — New COVID-19 mutation the Gamma Variant garnered attention with a cryptic tweet telling followers it had “big”…
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Freelancer
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Prepare to have your faith in humanity restored! When neighbors found out that 87-year-old Sacramento resident Robert Manzana needed help…
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Tiana Miller
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WESTBURY, N.Y. — Multiple despondent mourners confirmed that local punk “Fast” Eddie Gwan recently saved thousands if not more in…
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Bobby Korec
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LOS ANGELES — Local therapist Dr. Dana Therenspoon gave their patient exactly one month to live during a routine check-in,…
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Dianne Nora
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MILWAUKEE — An emerging COVID variant is reportedly optimistic about municipalities dropping their mask mandates across the county and excited…
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Eric Navarro
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Once again, Disney has taken tragedy and turned it into something we can upvote on Reddit. When superfan Brian McKenzie…
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