John Sevigne
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June 10, 2021
DUCKBURG, Calisota — Multi-billionaire businessfowl Scrooge McDuck is questioning his decision to convert his wealth to cryptocurrency after realizing he…
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Bobby Korec
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June 1, 2021
Move over, Christian Bale. There’s a way more method-y actor in Hollywood, and it’s none other than 2021’s Nickelodeon Kids’…
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Ted Pillow
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May 25, 2021
GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. — Daniel Powers is searching for an acceptable way to find out if his niece’s upcoming birthday…
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James Knapp
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May 9, 2021
FROSTBURG, Md. — Local mom Beverly Hurd, whose son graduated with a creative writing degree more than a decade ago,…
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James Knapp
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May 9, 2021
Alright, so I know I’m probably gonna get some pushback on this and, honestly, I get it. I know my…
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Tyler Dark
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April 24, 2021
LOS ANGELES — Former precocious one-year-old and current convicted felon on parole Tommy Pickles, now 31, allegedly muttered to himself…
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Mark Hassenfratz
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April 23, 2021
HARTFORD, Conn. — Local punk and 31-year-old adult man Kenny Whalen remains blissfully unaware that he is the Whalen family’s…
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Kyle Sekaquaptewa
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November 16, 2020
SEATTLE — Local woman Rachel Mendoza discovered yesterday that the entire medicine cabinet of adult human and potential partner Ben…
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Tom Peters
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October 28, 2020
GARDINER, Mont. — Sacred Blessings Ranch resident Ricky Valencia has grown impatient with his fellow commune members for repeatedly failing…
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Ramona Apthorp
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October 25, 2020
NEW YORK — Spotify CEO Daniel Ek reportedly won .0005% custody of his children in a landmark hearing yesterday, according…
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