I was looking through some mail I stole when I saw an invitation to the NYC Prince’s Ball, and realized it was tonight! I knew…
There’s something off about Josh, and it isn’t his impossibly perfect skin. This guy is glowing, there’s no denying that. But behind that blemish-free face,…
CORPUS CHRISTI, TEXAS — An overloaded barge containing nearly fifty thousand gallons of coconut oil spilled into the Gulf Of Mexico causing over 300 species…
FOREST PARK, Ill. — Local woman in her mid-30s Laura McMann was carded again late yesterday evening when attempting to buy alcohol after her hormonal…
LOS ANGELES — Members of pop rock outfit Maroon 5 are wondering when they will finally enjoy the fruits of the band’s success that their…
MONTREAL — An alarming new study revealed that body dysmorphia diagnoses skyrocketed just hours after clothing manufacturer Gildan released a highly maligned intimate apparel collection.…
I don’t want to brag, but I have figured out the secret to life. I know how to keep it all together, now. It’s not…
NEW YORK — Members of glam rock group KISS were spotted using a stockpile of Sephora points at a local store late yesterday morning to…
CHICAGO — Local metalhead, avid corpse paint donner and frequent leather pants wearer Zachary Petrosyan is reportedly fed up with constantly being mistaken for a…
LOS ANGELES — Local goth Jenny Carlisle successfully subverted cosmetic trends earlier this week by having her asshole professionally darkened at a nearby salon, unenthused…