Bobby Korec
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Dear poor Republican voters. Are you stupid or something? I'm only asking because you keep voting against your interests. Did…
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Dan Rice
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There is a specter haunting Halloween — the specter of communism. My name is Toby Masterson. I am 12 years…
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Peter Woods
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Alright, listen. I’m sick of dealing with this over and over again, so I’m setting the record straight for good…
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Dan Rice
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I believe that public safety is important, but between the “Warning: Correctional Facility in Area” signs, the creepy weirdo who…
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Nathan Kamal
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Listen, we both know there’s a...distance between us. I’ve felt it, and I’m sure you have too. We’re growing further…
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James Knapp
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So I’m a “poser,” am I? Why? Oh, I get it. Just because I've never been to a concert that…
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I understand why you did it. I’ve never been an easy person to buy gifts for. So why go to…
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Eric Navarro
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Now that many schools have gone virtual, we need to address cyberbullying. Specifically, how necessary it is. Sure, in the…
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Jay Wells L'Ecuyer
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Ow! Seriously, that really fucking hurts! It feels like you're slowly slitting my bicep with a hot, wet scalpel. I…
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Constantine Platanias
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There are so many things to hate about this entitled millennial generation, but nothing scorches my sky more than their…
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