Culture Archives - Page 406

Conspiracy Theorist Uncovers Shocking Plot to Remove Him From Group Chat

Ted Pillow • May 31, 2020

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. — Local conspiracy theorist Vinnie Logano discovered a secret plot yesterday to kick him out of the “BFF…

Read More →

Overworked Cop Having Trouble Separating Work Assault from Home Assault

Krissy Howard • May 31, 2020

AKRON, Ohio — Local cop Officer Ryan Kowalcyzk admitted he is having a tough time separating the assault he commits…

Read More →

Hydroxychloroquine Transforms President Trump Into Cool Alter Ego “Donny Love”

Alex Salcido • May 30, 2020

WASHINGTON — President Trump’s experimental use of the anti-malarial drug Hydroxychloroquine has transformed the Commander-in-Chief from a boorish, morbidly obese,…

Read More →

halloween, spirit, covid-19, NJ, Egg Harbor

Spirit Halloween Announces Plan to Re-Open in October, Close in November

Tucker Leighty-Phillips • May 30, 2020

EGG HARBOR, N.J. — Spirit Halloween announced today that they will keep their stores closed until October, when they will…

Read More →

Opinion: I’m Not Like Those Gun Toting Militia Maniacs, I’m Just in This Forest Preserve to Suck off Some Strangers

Brendan Kelly • May 30, 2020

The other day I’m down in Pioneer Forest Preserve minding my own business, doing my thing. Next thing you know…

Read More →

Man Enters Week Seven of Pretending He Was Having Any Sex Before This

Anya Volz • May 30, 2020

PITTSFORD, Vt. — 28-year-old Alex Solorzano is now in his seventh week of blaming social distancing for his sexual inactivity,…

Read More →

17,984 Police Stations Sadly Still Untorched

Freelancer • May 29, 2020

MINNEAPOLIS — Rioters protesting the unlawful killing of another unarmed black man at the hands of police officers successfully burned…

Read More →

Hometown Facebook Group Not Even Being Subtle About Racism Anymore

Louie Aronowitz • May 29, 2020

DUBLIN, Ga. — Members of the official Facebook group for all things related to Dublin, Ga., have finally stopped hiding…

Read More →

Police Confirm Standard Target Practice Cut Out Character Has Back Turned

Kyle Sekaquaptewa • May 29, 2020

NEW YORK — NYC Police Commissioner Dermot Shea confirmed today that police shooting targets all come standard with their backs…

Read More →

Cop Shoots Klansman in Suicide

Doug Francisco • May 28, 2020

MUNCIE, Ind. — Sgt. William Porter, an active member of the Ku Klux Klan, was killed last night following a…

Read More →

Stay Updated on The Latest Punk News