PALMDALE, CA — Customers and baristas of The Catalyst Coffee Shop were shaken to their core Sunday afternoon when sick fuck Andrew Murphy ordered an…
SEATTLE — A six-year-old purple otter pop was granted a new life purpose as a DIY ice pack after a record heat wave hitting the…
CHICAGO — Cadets of the Chicago Police Academy were reminded of the exhausting six weeks of training they endured in order to become full-fledged police…
HAVERHILL, Mass. — A punk-themed ice cream truck impressed potential patrons yesterday with a raw, energetic version of “Turkey in the Straw” that lasted roughly…
TEMPE, Ariz. — Local idiot Eli Burkhardt made a fool of himself today by accidentally cutting off his jeans vertically, leaving the back of his…
NEW BRUNSWICK, N.J. — A man wearing a faded, several-years-old novelty Labatt Blue hockey jersey at an all-ages show last week marked the unofficial end…
FLAGSTAFF, Ariz. — Local teenage lifeguard Jeremy Keenum openly wished yesterday that someone at the recreational pool he covers would somehow forget how to swim…
NEW YORK — The New York City Department of Parks and Recreation released today its highly anticipated annual summer guide, which now includes the best…