LANGLEY, Va. — American intelligence analysts are increasingly fearful that Putin’s mental situation is worsening after a statement to Russian state media about what constitutes…
SMYRNA, Tenn. — Local toddler Lana Findlay was forced once again to play the parent and comfort her hysterical mom and dad following the viewing…
PHOENIX, Ariz. — Local bassist and film studies drop-out Will Levey reportedly refers to his new love interest, Allison Alonzo, as “the Nancy to my…
ORLANDO, Fla. — An alarming new report revealed that Nickelodeon executives have been using the set of ‘90s game show “Legends of The Hidden Temple”…
NEW YORK — Local insomniac Mike Robinson is celebrating the annual Daylight Savings tradition because he will have one less hour in the day to…
INDIANAPOLIS — Local couple Darren Ganon and Sally Bouchard-Sanchez announced they will continue pursuing their toxic relationship in order to maintain a steady diet of…
BOSTON — Local woman Ava Rivera experienced what she believed to be a breakthrough last week after suffering her first panic attack about something realistically…
CAMP HILL, Penn. — Suburban couple George and Esme Albertson discretely removed their sweatshop-grade cardboard yard sign, which professed unwavering support for people of all…
PUEBLO, Colo. — A local man’s plan to introduce his childhood best friend of over 20 years to his adult best friend for the past…
FANWOOD, N.J. — Self-described punk kid Scott “Snotski” Tamaro turned 50 this week, shocking both friends and family yet again with his inability to use…
BOSTON — Local man Chet Deacon began the conversation on a first day with Alyssa Marco by apologizing for “the mess” of his entire being…
MAUI, Hawaii — A humpback whale off the coast of Maui found the musical offerings overheard from noise-rock-themed ‘Sonic Cruise’ to be lacking in originality,…
Terrible things every day but when the residents of West Chester, Ohio heard that local first-grader Erik Richey was diagnosed with terminal cancer, they decided…
MEADVILLE, Penn. — A week before his child abuse trial, local priest Justin Canthorne continues to cast himself as a “misunderstood iconoclast,” according to the…
AUSTIN, Texas — Local punk and self-declared “dish-truther” Sammy Gladwin has been reported by multiple sources as using both sides of plates to save on…