Another week has joylessly passed you by uneventfully and without even the slightest hint of fanfare. You could argue that the increasingly bleak state of…
BOSTON — Jane’s Addiction guitarist, and “Ink Master” host, Dave Navarro admitted that he’s shocked it took this long for someone to punch him following…
CHICAGO — New IT support person, and self-proclaimed punk, Alex Holden is causing frustrations with fellow employees at Hawthorne Inc. by suggesting they punch their…
WINNETKA, Ill. — New Trier High School bully from the class of 1997, Al Edwin, is amazed at what losers and lame motherfuckers can get…
We’ve all been there. You’re blasting Mötley Crüe’s greatest hits while cruising at 80 mph through a school zone when some nosy State trooper decides…
BOSTON — Local therapist Dr. Loic Middleberry attempted to reach new clients by introducing reduced-rate services for sessions focusing exclusively on dad issues in honor…
PENSACOLA, Fla. — A fistfight moments ago between local punks Deandra Ybarra and Carrie Wilks was described by all watching as “unexpectedly quiet and weird,”…
LORTON, Va. — Local man Devin Caulfield is now in his 11th year of attempting to explain his Screeching Weasel tattoo despite never having been…
COLUMBIA, Md. – Non-confrontational wuss Samuel Bleck took out decades of built-up frustration today by open-palm slapping drywall in his home and leaving a mild…