AUSTIN, Texas — Gov. Greg Abbott signed a new, statewide law today that would mandate each Texan to do their part to stop the spread…
This pandemic has been hard on all of us, especially those of us who believe it’s all one big liberal conspiracy to get me to…
AMITYVILLE, N.Y. — Local music fan Kyle Hartley was ridiculed at an outdoor Words Are Wind show yesterday for wearing the band’s COVID-19 mask he…
TALLAHASSEE, Fla. — Local Publix shopper Wesley Clemons removed his protective face mask this morning after realizing that no one else in the grocery store…
DALLAS — Patients at Dallas General Hospital learned yesterday that Dr. Graham Alder, one of the facility’s most trusted surgeons, is actually a “total pussy”…
LANSING, Mich. — A protester at a recent demonstration against the state’s pandemic response has revealed that he’ll show up at more or less any…
LOS ANGELES — Local metalhead Rob Kurtz was reportedly called out at the grocery store yesterday for converting an old Deafheaven shirt into a face…
NEW YORK — Dr. Mark Miller turned down a homemade mask today that could help protect him from COVID-19 after seeing that it featured album…
SEATTLE — Local musician Shelby Betancourt’s homemade N95 face mask, fashioned out of a flyer for an upcoming show, was destroyed yesterday by a passerby…
OMAHA, Neb. — Local punk and part-time crafts enthusiast Mark Penderson, seeing a need for DIY face masks to help fight the spread of COVID-19,…
ATLANTA — In an effort to slow the spread of the novel COVID-19, the Center for Disease Control recommended today that U.S. citizens dress in…
DALLAS — Local bank robber Kevin Rice’s alleged attempt at a heist late yesterday evening was thwarted when he was mistakenly identified as a fifth…