Heather Cook
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April 29, 2021
A relationship is a lot like a mixtape. You put a ton of time and effort into making something wonderful…
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Dan Rice
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April 26, 2021
I’m not going to tell you his name. He remains a very powerful frog in the industry, and I don’t…
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Heather Cook
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April 23, 2021
NORTH HALEDON, N.J. — Local failure Max Kugler was reportedly sighted practicing his ollies at the Haledon Skate Park on…
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Mark Hassenfratz
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April 23, 2021
HARTFORD, Conn. — Local punk and 31-year-old adult man Kenny Whalen remains blissfully unaware that he is the Whalen family’s…
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Patrick Coyne
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February 14, 2021
SHERMER, Ill. — A heavily scripted and complex romantic gesture made by local man Chase Stratford last week reportedly swept…
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Krissy Howard
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February 14, 2021
MIAMI — Local holiday and generally despised time of the year, Valentine’s Day, is determined to absolutely destroy one of…
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Ted Pillow
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February 13, 2021
ST. LOUIS — Local man Brian Dorney’s Valentine’s Day preparations allegedly revolve exclusively around convincing his girlfriend that 1988 classic…
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John Danek
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February 12, 2021
BETHESDA, Md. — “Duplicitous catfisher” and clearly regular homo sapien Colleen Jansen disappointed prospective love match Dominic Sabatino yesterday after…
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VANCOUVER, Wash. — Local neo-fascist Greg Pough retired as an active member of the Proud Boys today following a three-second…
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Dan Rice
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February 1, 2021
I’m not a religious person or anything, but in some ways I guess I’m just old fashioned. This may not…
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