John Danek
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LONG BEACH, Calif. — Metalcore band Her Empty Lungs have yet to replicate the success of their Lady Gaga “Poker…
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Krissy Howard
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FARMINGTON, N.M. — Local man Derek Romero received the disappointment of a lifetime after the metal band he had devoted…
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Rob Steinberg
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DRAG KINGDOM — The tyrannical Drag Queen known as Cleo Fabtra was overthrown in an absolutely fabulous revolution by drag…
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James Knapp
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BERLIN — A group of punks and aspiring assassins traveled eighty years back in time only to fail in their…
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Heather Cook
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LANGHORNE, Pa. — Local clueless friend Jordan Schmidt overlooked the lifelong trauma of being dumped in the smelly black hole…
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David Britton
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NEW YORK — Producers of “Fox & Friends” announced today that they will move the popular news show from its…
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Jonah Nink
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CHICAGO — Local bassist Tim Bolz announced this morning that he has “still got it” after remembering how to play…
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Mark Turner
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LANCASTER, Pa. — Hundreds of metalcore bands were seen scurrying off in different directions in a local factory late yesterday…
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Krissy Howard
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BERNALILLO, N.M. — The abandoned crusts on a medium, two-topping pizza purchased and eaten yesterday evening were seen in an…
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Ryan Danley
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SEATTLE — New grocery store hire and hardcore punk Dan Lorenz has reluctantly chosen an alternative rock fan as his…
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