TORONTO — A recent trip to an out-of-town Subway made you realize how much better managed it is than the Subway you normally eat at…
CHICAGO — Local stoner Lukas James accidentally tasted his first apple in over ten years last week after using it to construct a homemade smoking…
Hey guys, I know I’m running a little late but — I know, I know, I’m trying to get there. I’m just super behind right…
SAN FRANCISCO — Presidio Heights residents Bella and Hilton Dell are close to surpassing the 90-minute mark talking about the air fryer and bidet they…
MIAMI — Local police officer Arnold Griffin, a 19-year veteran of the force, was cut down in the line of duty during his lunch break…
DOVER, Del. — A local townie and currently wasted-off-his-ass scallop is rambling on about the time his rubbery body was hurled across the room by…
BERNALILLO, N.M. — The abandoned crusts on a medium, two-topping pizza purchased and eaten yesterday evening were seen in an entirely new way late this…
Of the 178 reality shows MTV released between 2002-2005, none of them quite popularized using a blacklight to look for semen on bed sheets like…
LEWISBURG, W.V. — A $35 gift card for the Kroger grocery store chain, courtesy of local mamaw Juanita Crabb, is expected to supersede all other…
Just as music fans argue about genre classifications, foodies debate cuisines. And there is no cuisine more abstract than that which goes by the name…
NASHUA, N.H. — Pheasant Lane Mall Target employee Trevor Bennequist clocked out yesterday for lunch, only to discover that buying food would cost him more…
WASHINGTON — White House kitchen staff are reportedly elated by the prospect of cooking “real food” for President-elect Joe Biden instead of preparing the usual…
Like many Los Angeles transplants, I don’t go home for every holiday. And since I don’t want to miss out on sick-ass Christmas gifts, I…
With Covid taking a victory lap around the country, it seems everyone’s holiday plans are up in the air. Well, not mine. Social distance Thanksgiving,…
AUSTIN — Frustrating employees and other patrons and holding up the line behind him with his questions, a local gamer asked a Chipotle employee taking…