Jack Bravstein
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May 8, 2021
SAN FRANCISCO — After liking, sharing, and commenting on his posts, it looks like your “new friend” from last week's…
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Tyler Roland
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March 30, 2021
EVANSTON, Ill. — Local man Ryan Michaelson began a new ritual last October, placing $7 in his fridge each time…
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James Knapp
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March 18, 2021
AUSTIN, Texas — Local 20-somethings Ashton Knoll and Kevin Stohl were approved yesterday for a second mortgage on their fiddle…
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Patrick Coyne
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February 15, 2021
JONESBORO, Ark. — Local burnout Declan Goddard finally achieved his long-term goal of securing a “sort of funny” and “only…
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Krissy Howard
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February 14, 2021
MIAMI — Local holiday and generally despised time of the year, Valentine’s Day, is determined to absolutely destroy one of…
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Stephen Bell
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February 5, 2021
RYE, UNITED KINGDOM — Legendary musician and founding member of the Beatles Paul McCartney admitted today that he wished someone…
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Shea Strauss
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December 19, 2020
WILMINGTON, N.C. — Hallmark Channel’s signature Christmas-themed romance movies reportedly promote an unhealthy expectation of any kind of human interaction,…
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Steve Yuen
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November 21, 2020
CULVER CITY, Calif. — Former “Pimp My Ride” contestant and man currently living out of “the dopest Civic in SoCal”…
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Johnny Mo
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November 8, 2020
SAN JOSE, Calif. — Quarantined suitor Gabe Dawson canceled his highly anticipated Zoom date with “hot barista Dylan” last night…
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Patrick Lilly
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October 14, 2020
ANAHEIM, Calif. — Yesterday’s funeral for beloved ska frontman Bruce Becker was strangely positive despite the somber occasion, due to…
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