Death Tag Archives - Page 20

Amazon “Employee of the Month” Awarded Posthumously

Jon Wood • May 22, 2020

STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. — Recently deceased Amazon warehouse worker Freddie Romero was named “Employee of the Month” yesterday for his…

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Google Itching to Autofill “Death” as User Types in TV Show Character Name

Jeremy Kaplowitz • May 18, 2020

MOUNTAIN VIEW, Calif. — The Google algorithm was reportedly itching to autofill the word “death” as user Marianne Gibbs typed…

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Gamer Honors Friend at Funeral With Homie Stock

Liam O'Malley • May 14, 2020

MONROE, Ohio — Following a time-honored Super Smash Bros. tradition to even the score between players, local gamer and mourning…

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Republican Grandma Dies of Democratic Hoax

Zach Russell • April 12, 2020

YONKERS, N.Y. — 83-year-old Judith Swanson tragically passed away last night at New York Presbyterian Hospital due to complications from…

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Oh Fuck, I Hit Deerhoof With My Car

Jason VanSlycke • March 5, 2020

Damnit! Oh no, oh fuck, I just hit Deerhoof with my car! Look, first of all, it's been raining all…

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EMT, emergency, music, snob, music snob, dead

Music Snob EMT Can’t Decide Which Song to Set Chest Compressions To

Malcolm Whitfield • February 26, 2020

ATLANTA — Emergency Medical Technician Avery Jamison searched through his Spotify playlist for several minutes yesterday before administering chest compressions…

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Eight Somehow Dead After Launch of Black Metal Streaming Service

Tim Sheard • February 25, 2020

OSLO, Norway — The brand new, all-black metal streaming platform “Corpsify +” is responsible for the brutal deaths of eight…

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Musician’s Funeral Turnout Pretty Good For a Tuesday Night

Issa Diao • February 18, 2020

TACOMA, Wash. — The funeral for moderately popular local musician Adam Klein was rather well-attended despite being held on a…

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Punk Coroner Keeps Pushing Back Time of Death

James Knapp • February 12, 2020

NEW YORK — Local coroner and punk Wayne “Bonecracker” Davis frustrated his colleagues last week, repeatedly pushing back the time…

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This Couple Died on the Same Day After Being Married for 55 Years and Getting Hit by My Car

Mark Maira • February 6, 2020

It’s not often that you get to be part of a love story that spans decades, affects generations, and captures…

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