Well, it’s been a long and particularly depressing winter, and it started to feel like it would never end, but wouldn’t you know it, spring…
EAST PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Local man Kevin Wright announced plans to leave all of his worldly possessions to his best friend should he die, according…
Earlier this week, iconic American filmmaker David Lynch died, leaving behind an astonishingly brilliant and bizarre body of work that blends violence, romance, mystery, surrealism,…
SHIPPENSBURG, Penn. — Local widow Claire Donnelly wouldn’t shut the hell up about her former spouse who tragically passed away recently, confirmed sources who have…
Look, I’m not really a religious or spiritual person but I’ve been around the block long enough to know that if Green Day’s “Good Riddance”…
Legendary musician, producer, and seemingly the luckiest son of a bitch around, Quincy Jones died at his home in Bel Air Sunday night just a…
BALTIMORE — Recently deceased punk Cary Lowery’s will primarily consisted of returning the stolen property he took from his closest friends over the years, confirmed…
PHILADELPHIA — Former President Trump deviated from his prepared talking points to pay tribute to Darth Vader and the countless jobs he created running his…
A month ago today, I was hit by a minivan in a Golden Corral parking lot. A tunnel of white light enveloped me with a…
RICHMOND, Va.— Local man Brent Gould shocked and confused all those in attendance at the funeral of his recently deceased friend when he opened his…
LOS ANGELES — Tragedy struck Southern California Wednesday night when a toddler was discovered dead inside a Tesla Cybertruck from an apparent case of massive…
TACOMA, Wash. — Mourners attending the funeral for local goth legend Joshua Proach, also known as Alistair Nightfall, weren’t sure which of the several hearses…
WASHINGTON — President Biden insists he’s not dropping out of the presidential race even though his head was separated from his body in a freak…
TRAVERSE CITY, Mich. — Members of the local death metal band Flesh Quilt figured it would be a wasted opportunity to not take a killer…
Ailing Man Dies Despite Several “You Got This” Reddit Comments
KOKOMO, Ind. — Local man Andrew Stoltz succumbed to an illness even though he received multiple positive reassurances online, according to users of the fantasy…