Robert Butler
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June 8, 2024
SEATTLE — Local parents Chris and Maggie Nelson forced their teenage son to listen to the entire Red Hot Chili…
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Ian Steffé
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May 13, 2024
WATERBURY, Vt. — Ben and Jerry’s announced they joined forces with indie rock musician/gas station attendant Mac DeMarco to unveil…
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Ryan Dondero
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December 31, 2023
PHILADELPHIA — Local Punk, Sid Stott, announced his plans to improve his health and well-being by smoking healthier cigarettes in…
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Emma Jonas
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December 27, 2023
OLYMPIA, Wash. — Professional punk magician Lyle “Skid” Harber is reportedly creating spectacles at a number of dive bars in…
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Doug Kolic
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December 21, 2023
MILWAUKEE – Identical punk twins Ryan and Bryan Ohland recently revealed their ability to sense when the other is jonesing…
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Tim Graham
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November 19, 2023
DAVENPORT, Iowa — Local delinquent Christine Pritchard surprised friends and family when she somehow obtained a prescription for cigarettes, according…
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Tim Graham
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August 26, 2023
MENOMONEE FALLS, Wis. — Local youngster Phoebe Flax, age 9, is reportedly selling loose cigarettes alongside her delicious lemonade, according…
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Wyatt Fair
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August 24, 2023
I wait tables at a French bistro in the Lower East Side of Manhattan. We’ve got a Michelin star, a…
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Wyatt Fair
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August 21, 2023
PASADENA, Calif. – Southern California native Zack Martin admitted his favorite summer activity is smoking cigarettes in his apartment with…
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Matt Husser
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August 6, 2023
NEW YORK — The annual “Punk Humanitarian of the Year” award was given to local drunk Rick Johnson who selflessly…
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