SCRANTON, Penn. — Toby Louvern, lead vocalist in doom-pop band Expired Sex, was stricken with the deepest existential terror of his life during a recent…
AUSTIN, Texas — Local horny-as-hell woman Wendy Charleton fears what might happen if she were to get drunk alone with close friend Collin Montrose due…
CHICAGO — Local boyfriend who’s changed, he swears, Britt Keller promised on again-off again girlfriend Carolyn Mueller that he will do as little as humanly…
BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Local psychedelic doo-wop band Francis and the Francy Boys are preparing to play the “only a few tix left” gambit in response…
Breaking up with someone is always difficult, but at least when you’re ending a romantic relationship there is a template to follow. Chances are it’s…
Convenience food gets a bad rap, but things have come a long way since a stringy Salisbury steak in a foil tray! In fact, many…
You spent four years in the most exhilarating relationship of your life. For the first time, you felt lovable. You never thought a loser like…
PITTSBURGH — Local woman Stephanie Commita’s relationship of seven years is reportedly “teetering on the brink of complete collapse” following a recent amateur tarot card…
TAMPA, Fla. — A nude photograph sent by a young woman to a new sexual partner early Saturday morning was allegedly responded to with only…
TAMPA, Fla. – Local emo singer Dacian Miron was seen in a Chipotle parking lot pathetically begging his girlfriend to dump him over voicemail so…
LOS ANGELES — Longtime Smashing Pumpkins guitarist, James Iha, abruptly announced this week that he is parting ways with the band after realizing he had…
LANGHORNE, Pa. — Local clueless friend Jordan Schmidt overlooked the lifelong trauma of being dumped in the smelly black hole of a Denny’s parking lot…
It’s fine. I am telling you it’s fine. If it will make you feel better I will already do it first. I mean I haven’t…
DULUTH, Minn. — Local couple Alice Parker and Shaun McCoy announced the reunification of their relationship today, after having already broken up and reconciled twice…
PHILADELPHIA — Your friend Bella Dubois is reportedly now back with her old band The New Babies, leaving you feeling like an idiot for all…